The story of a girl...

Let me tell you a story of a girl, named Crystal, who will never learn no matter where she is in this world.  It starts like this...Crystal was suddenly awakened by what she thought was the sound of a bell.  Hoping it was the UPS man with the 20lb package from Mom and Pop with all the things she forgot or needed, she ran to the door.   Once she realized that the bell sound was a figment of her imagination, she called the superintendent to come fix the window and the light in the hallway that was burned out.  She was so nice to him  they became BFFs and said he offered to let UPS drop the package off at his place if it arrived while she was gone for her first day of work!  That put Crystal's mind at ease because that package had sheets for her bed that she desperately needed.  Sleeping on sheets that smell musty and old even after they have been washed is not her favorite. Still, Crystal was worried about that package getting to apartment 6C before she had to leave at 2:30. This was going to be UPS second attempt and it just had to be delivered.  There's no way for her to carry that much stuff on a subway to and from the Bronx where it would have been stuck. Her worrying caused her to do something crazy.  Her roommate, who is now gone for the rest of the summer, told her to not close the door behind her without keys because it is set to stay locked all the time.  Of course, that information slipped her mind when she attempted to make sure the doorbell was working so she could hear UPS ring it.  Well, it worked but now she was locked out of her apartment with no keys and no phone to call anyone.  In a split second she had to think fast.  It was 1:00 PM and she had to leave soon so she wouldn't be late for her first day. Also, lunch was on the stove.  What a predicament!!!  First she went down to her new BFFs apartment but no answer.  Then, a lightbulb went off, and she thought of the fire escape. Why not?  The window was open and it was easily accessible.  As she walked across the street to examine the situation, she weighed the option of climbing the fire escape or finding another way.  Since there was no other way, she decided to go for it.  She asked the 99 cent store directly below her complex for a ladder.  When she did, they looked at her with crazy looks and directed her to the store next door for that ladder.  Again, when she asked for a ladder at the bicycle shop she was given more crazy looks. The good news is they had a ladder and allowed her to use it.  Bad news is that now Crystal had to figure out how to get from the ladder on the ground to the escape ladder because there was still a huge gap between them!  The manager from the bicycle shop was very leery about Crystal climbing the fire escape.  At first, he didn't believe that she lived there and asked if her roommate was there to open the door for her.  When she said no that she lived by herself he said "okay but I'll help you."  So, Crystal started climbing the ladder from the bicycle shop, got to the very top and grabbed on to about the third rung of the escape ladder.  When she grabbed onto the escape ladder,  it wiggled a whole lot more than expected so she looked down at the man helping her and said "Is this gonna be safe?"  He replied "I don't know."  She proceeded with caution and had to hoist herself onto the escape ladder.  It was was basically a fierce pull up.  Keep in mind that climbing a fire escape is not safe, and it's very looked down upon by the superintendents but Crystal is a little bit of a rebel and climbed 6 flights of stairs on the fire escape while an audience of about 5 or 6 watched the whole thing happen.  Once she got to the very top of the fire escape, she climbed in to the open window, waved down below to the man from the bicycle shop and yelled thank you!   Whew! She was only away from her apartment for a total of 15 minutes and made it on time to her first day of work at Cranky's!!!  However, she missed the UPS man that she was so worried about missing in the first place.  Oh well, life goes and another adventure was had by Crystal.  Whether Crystal lives in New York City or San Antonio, Texas, stuff like this will always happen. 

Love
Crystal, the adventurous Miss Gulley in Manhattan