Miss Gulley in Manhattan: November 2012

Take courage my soul and let us journey on,

though the night is dark and I am far from home;

Thanks be to God, the morning light appears

The storm is passing over (Lord)

The storm is passing over

The storm is passing over, hallelujah

These lyrics to one of my favorite choir songs came to mind today as I watched the news because they describe the events of the past few days so perfectly. Sandy came with a vengeance and devastated parts of Queens and Lower Manhattan. The subways are flooded and it's going to take a long time for this place to get back to normal. As I watched the news today and all day yesterday of the storm coverage and the aftermath I'm blown away by Sandy's rage but for some reason it doesn't seem real. I'm here in New York, I braved the storm all by myself in my own little corner of Astoria, Queens unscathed. I was never scared, the power never went out, the street I live on was untouched and life went back to normal for most. It's almost an eerie feeling that I can't really describe. I don't think I will fully grasp what happened until I make it into the city in the next few days and see it with my own eyes.
The events leading up to the past few days were interesting. I became homeless when Jeff returned from his summer gig last Saturday and had to do some couch surfing for a few days. I stayed on the couch at Jeff's until Wednesday and then went and stayed with Elizabeth and her husband, Jared. They offered me their place for the weekend while they were out of town so I jumped on the chance to enjoy some alone time in Washington Heights. I really like the area that they live in. It's right next to Fort Washington Park and the George Washington Bridge so they have a great view and are in a nice quiet pocket of the city. While I was homeless I secured a sweet deal on a one bedroom apartment in Astoria until November 26th, thanks to my former roommate Cheryl. I bought myself a little bit more time to find a long term place.
When I heard the storm was coming I asked Jeff if he would help me move my massive amount of crap 7 blocks away to my new place on Sunday before the subways shutdown at 7:00. I told Elizabeth I was leaving her place early before they got back and I was scheduled to have a meeting with Corrie and Laura, the founders of NYC CYT to discuss how things are going. I was a little nervous about the meeting because I know they don't normally meet individually with the teachers so I knew they wanted to talk to me about something specific but I had no idea what it was.
When I got to our meeting place I was loaded down with all my bags that I had from staying at Elizabeth's and told them my story of couch surfing. We made some small talk and then they prefaced the meeting with, "We just wanted to get together with you because you weren't at the teachers meeting and we wanted to hear your thoughts on how you think things are going. What's working, what's not working etc." So I just kind of sat there and nodded my head like okay what do you want to know? Then they asked "what is working for you?" I said "well, I really think things are going well but I kind of feel like an outsider looking in. I like watching Richelle teach and sort of being in the background so I can take it all in because I'm so new to teaching theatre and I don't really know what I'm doing and I'm used to being in charge so it's good for me to be in this new role." We talked about a few other things and then Corrie said "It's interesting to hear you say you're kind of an outsider because we feel that way too. We need you to be actively participating in the classes and not just watching. The culture of CYT is messy and you just have to jump in there and do it." So, again I just nodded my head a little shocked at what she was telling me because I felt like I was jumping in there and getting involved....but it was clearly not up to their standards. Through the conversation I realized, through tears of course, that I was a little hurt I didn't have my own class and was told in front of everyone at our very first teachers meeting. Laura gently said to me at one point "it seems you might have some control issues." And I guess I do have control issues but It's hard to jump in when I don't know what I'm doing. I also realized I have no idea what it looks like to be an assistant according to them because I said at one point, "I just need to get with Richelle and ask her how we can divide the class and how I can help her teach." Corrie jumped in quickly and said "That's not what I want. Richelle, planned those lessons so she teaches them. You need to come along side her and be ready for whatever she needs" Okay, so again, I thought that's what I was doing. Any way, I cried a lot but the conversation was a gentle rebuke about getting over the fact that I'm unfamiliar with what it looks like to be an assistant and the fact that I'm uncomfortable. Being uncomfortable seems to be the theme of my life these days and I'm figuring out how to work through it and get over it. It must be a lesson I've got to learn. But man, it's tough and I don't really like it.
Once the meeting was over I was a little wounded but thankful that my christian sisters love me enough to gently remind me to be strong and courageous like Joshua 1:9, our theme verse for CYT says, and to step it up and do my job to their liking. After thinking about our conversation and processing all that was discussed it boils down to the fact that I need to develop stronger relationships with these people so I can feel more comfortable and that takes me spending time with them outside of a car ride to New Jersey every Monday night.
Anyway, after my meeting I headed to Astoria to get my stuff and move into my new place. I was a little antsy to get there because it was getting dark and the subway was about to shut down in 2 hours. My loads of crap only took about 30 minutes to load into Jeff's car and about 30 minutes to unload 7 blocks away. After I unloaded I went to the store to get food, water, a flashlight and batteries, a lighter for candles in case the power went out and of course, a bottle of wine. The grocery store was a little insane but that's expected when we are told to prepare for the worst. After my shopping I locked myself in my new one bedroom, turned on the news and watched the storm coverage for the next two days. If I missed anything my sister made sure to text me all the updates too. (Love you sis).
While I sat and waited for the storm to pass over I cleaned my apartment, unpacked, practiced and sort of wished I wasn't all by myself. I think I should have stayed at my old place so I wouldn't have been so bored. Oh well, another coulda, shoulda, woulda. I'm just thankful that I have an awesome place to stay, that I made it through a devastating storm and that I had people praying for safety.

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A few days have passed after the storm and things are getting back to normal. I went to work on Wednesday and was happy to get out of the house. The buses were the only public transportation running and some people had to wait over three hours to get into the city. Thankfully, I did not have to wait that long. On the bus we were crammed in, body to body and the traffic in Manhattan was crazy because street lights were out. All of lower Manhattan below 34th street is without power for who knows how long so it really effects everything. As I was riding on the bus I couldn't really see a lot of damage but the feeling in the air was a bit somber compared to the hustle and bustle that normally permeates the city. Partial subway lines opened yesterday but again, they are packed to the brim. It's almost faster to walk than to wait for a train car that you can fit on. So, the aftermath is great but the restoration has begun.

Love a thankful, uncomfortable girl,
Miss Gulley in Manhattan